Dreams + tears = ?

I remember the first time it happened.

1993. I slept on the floor. Woke up crying at about 3am. Don't even ask me why. Like most questions, I can only confidently answer it with a definite "I don't know". That's probably my motto in life I think. Or it's been thus far anyway.

In retrospect, I place those times as my 'formative' years of growing up and finding my place. (read: I felt bloody lost). I guess it was my subconscious telling myself that it was time to stop all the silly shit I was doing.

These days, however, ahhhh, well they're a whole field of studies by itself.

Like this blog, it's about her (or at least I feel it is). Four weekends back, I woke up crying in the mid-morning. Three weekends back, I woke up crying at 6 am. Two days back, I dreamt of her. But I didn't wake up crying. I woke up first, then I cried. Sheesh.

Sure I know I'm a crybaby. Sure I've got baggage. But to have my subconscious self manifest my repressed thoughts like that is waaaaaay scary.

So if you're a psychoanalyst, psychologist or sexologist (insert perverted smirk here), tell me what it is I'm going through k? Thanks.


P/S: Don't you even dare think of matchmaking me ML! :-p