Uh oh

What is it that makes you search for something?

Want? Need? Both?

Well, I'm usually for the latter, rather than the former, but when even both are...ummm...not quite the answer you were looking for, or somehow doesn't justify your going after it, then what?

What are you trying to tell me God?

13 years of having these questions and I still can't seem to find the answers. I know you're testing me again. But are these the same as before? Am I feeling what it is that I'm feeling? Is this a lesson to be learnt, or the conclusion, for all the lessons learnt?

I am uncertain. & have no way of making certain. & unfortunately, may not have the opportunity to make it a certainty. But, she makes me smile. She does. & perhaps Master Oogway was right.

& yet, it was I who asked for this.

So what now God? Please, show me the way. Amin.