Calvin's character-building snow plowing and such

Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet.
Only through experience of trial and suffering
can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared,
ambition inspired, and success achieved.
- Helen Keller

Ok, so maybe the quote above is a lot deeper than what Bill Watterson did in Calvin & Hobbes, but it is essentially the same thing. Even the whole process of Calvin's growing up with Hobbes is character-building.

Just like everything in life, He has His reasons. I'm still understanding my own place in this world and how exactly it is that I do fit in -& whether or not I'm supposed to fit in- but it just goes to show that life is indeed a journey. & for me, it's been one helluva roller-coaster ride of emotional & consequently, spiritual trips.

Now that I have other things, I don't have her, which is a gentle reminder from Him, I'm sure. But what do I do now, God? What is it that You seek of me?

If this emotional scar is meant to prepare me for my upcoming test from You, please let me know of it. I know I haven't been listening enough (at all?) to You, but I pray that You will please guide me to the Truth and that I shall recognize it for what it is. I feel so much sometimes that You're preparing me for bigger things, but I can only wonder what that could be 'coz thus far, I feel the biggest responsibility that I tried to undertake was to take care of my babyku. & I failed. Completely at that.

So was I not ready for her? Or the other way around? Did You take her 'coz I'm now responsible for someone else? Or that she is now needed by someone else? This character-building stuff is waaaay too hot to handle God, so I sure hope & pray that You give me the strength to successfully endure it. Amin.